Thursday, December 25, 2014


During APW 2014, I purchased two pieces of art: the larger work filling the frame and the infinity heart in the lower right corner of the frame.  I overlayed the infinity heart and the two pieces now hang on my office wall as one.

The larger work represents outer space to my eye, for I can readily identify the sun, earth and distant stars.  Interestingly, the artist told me this was not her creative intent.  When I foolishly asked for her interpretation, she said, "Anything you want it to be."  

Okay, I can work with that.  I stand pat on my original interpretation and see the work as outer space.  The infinity heart, of course, is a popular poly symbol for infinite love.  The two go together well: the infinite vastness of space and the infinite human capacity to love.  

I have read arguments about our capacity, as humans, to love others.  Some researchers believe there is a limit to the number of people a person can love in a deep, romantic sense.  In other words, they argue that the human capacity to love many people is exhausted when some large number of lovers is reached.  "Is it really possible to love, 600, 6000 or 600,000 people?" they might say.

Of course, as all poly folks know, our time and energy are finite and effectively limit the number of lovers any one person can have at any one time, and this number is much smaller than the human capacity to love.  Any argument challenging the infinite nature of love is highly theoretical, and as a practical matter, completely moot.  Love is indeed infinite.

The picture on my wall also has a spiritual connotation for me.  Many pagans consider the universe deity and worship accordingly.  When I see the picture, I am inspired by the awesomeness of the vast universe and the awesomeness of the vast human capacity to love.  We are all one, absolutely the same, and fully connected by energy.  Our sex-negative culture that conditions us to place absurd limits on how, and how many and who we relate to romantically and sexually is nothing short of cruel.  I believe the Universe (God, Source, Higher Power, however perceived) expects much more from us.  As humans, we have been given a mandate to love more and love better.               

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

More Than Two

More Than Two, published in September, 2014, is a book with a sharp focus on ethical non-monogamy.  Its authors, Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert attended APW 2014, where I had the privilege of meeting both.  At the conference, Franklin gave the keynote address and they jointly held informative workshops, which I attended.

Franklin is well known in the poly community, largely due to an expansive online blog which he has maintained for years.  Eve is a professional writer, editor and entrepreneur.  They are partners in work and life, and maintain a long distance relationship.  He lives in Portland, Oregon; she in Vancouver, BC.

I recently read somewhere that 36 books have been written on the subject of polyamory in the last thirty years.  This number sounds about right and I have read at least twenty-five of them.  More than any other, this book forces me to think.  Many well-grounded ideas and concepts are presented (some through the authors’ personal experience) which can be of benefit to those in any romantic relationship structure, even a monogamous relationship.  Although I am poly and well read, I learned some new things.  One of the more interesting is Eve’s poly structure, which was formed and is currently maintained for reasons I had not previously thought of.  I’m not going to give this away; you’ll have to read the book and you will be glad you did.